This way or that? Feb. 6, 2013

 


She unlocked her Facebook page again, either intentionally or careless as to who might access it. Or perhaps, she believed my blocking her keeps me from accessing it.

I unblocked her long ago, but don’t often check her page, even though I know she just can’t keep it shut down for some reason.

I always got the impression she used the page to keep up with contacts, though perhaps there is a greater need to reveal some aspects of her inner self, the way she exposes her most acute vulnerabilities with her poems.

Again, I wonder if it is a trap, done intentionally to draw me out into the open so as to say “ha! Ha!” to those who claimed she was crazy for thinking I might be stalking her.

Or perhaps she is reinforcing the message, in one instance in Spanish, that she was glad for the support of her companions

“Se siente bien para tener la oportunidad de trabajar juntos con gente tan buena y bien dedicada.”

Feel well for a chance to work together with such a good and well dedicated people.

Yet, within a day, she also posted: “I don't need no man. I got two cats, popcorn, and a Netflix Cosmos marathon.”

From her most recent poems, she appears to be deeply depressed, partly over the fact that she is forced to settle for a smaller role in society than she thinks she deserve, in a society of “wax patriots” as she said in one description.

Even then, she sees herself as a good soldier fighting a righteous campaign, opposing evil forces that close in on her from every side, buying perhaps a little of RR’s paranoia, while hunkering down with the Virgin Mayor as a necessity to assure her personal survival.

All this continues to raise the question as to how much of last year’s activities at our office were part of a deliberate plan, and if so, whose plan, RR’s or her own.

Is she really a victim of circumstance or a master manipulator who thrusts herself into various schemes with the mistaken notion fate owes her success, and that she has more control over her life than she actually has – as the PR person for the Congressman believes.

I tend to believe the first, rather than the second, although I still see her following a road that will eventually lead once more to failure, something she inevitably brings down upon herself.

Publicly, she seems to celebrate her admission into a society of rouges, but clearly from her poetry, she has serious doubts, knowing that her fate is tied to their fate, and she seems helpless to rise above it and find her own way, and ignores the obvious in order to just keep on going on.

If the Virgin Mayor fails, where does she go? Does RR have enough personal clout to carry her on his back to some new venture she can feel more comfortable in?

 

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